Hmmmmm… years ago, Grandma Frankie asked me as a little boy, “when did you learn that little girls legs weren’t attached to the bottom of their skirts?”
They’re not?
So, I was on the net the other day and some folks were talking about our ‘virtuous’ Southern California Trojan Lady Song Girls in a terrible way… it was like they went to the ‘Folle Bergeres’ in Paris ( historically, the women danced without underpants… my grandfather at the end of WWI wrote an amusing letter to his mother in Iowa saying he saw the ‘follies’ but she shouldn’t worry… as he caught no ‘cooties’… ha!)
In fact, the ‘debate’ on whether or not she was wearing something under her skirt surpassed talk about those couple of other minor and forgettable bowls this week…
My Professor & esteemed collegue Laura entered the debate by noting that the cheerleader in question was obviously wearing a ‘thong’. Which — to her — made it okay. Since Laura is seldom wrong… I decided that a deeper exploration of the issue was needed.
So after much study… it appears that she is wearing some sort of lacey something… even though I am the father of three daughters I don’t recognize it… in any event, she is wearing…’someTHING’.
Relax boys, this is about as racey as my blog gets.
Fight On! Congrats on THE Grand daddy of ALL Bowls Win… the Rose Bowl!
Being married to a Psychologist has made for many interesting experiences… every action I have ever taken has been completely analyzed… but as — I believe Freud said– sometimes a ‘cigar’ is just a cigar…. and a wife showing interest is a compliment after all.
ENTJ’s (masterminds) and INTJ’s (fieldmarshalls) are said to work well on the battlefield… assuming they are both on opposing armies… however, this isn’t intuitively supposed to be the best match-up for a couple. Personally, I needed an intelligent engineering-type woman ( who loves football)…. and Laura’s personality fit me perfectly. Laura and I have always enjoyed seeing how the other ‘thinks’… which I guess explains why we get along. I still seem to amuse her.
On the positive side, here is some things about Entj’s and Intj’s:
Likes looking at information from a global viewpoint, spotting patterns and relationships, that lead to an understanding of the key issues
Focuses more on possibilities for the future than the here-and-now
Enjoys change, challenge, and variety
If you check out the above linked articles , you can learn more about how these two personality types might conflict… none of this has been a surprise to either of us. As for me, I learned long ago to ‘let the wookie win.’
Here are some of the areas in which ENTJ and INTJ personalities may grate on others:
INTJ (Laura’s type) (1% of the population)
being single-minded or stubborn
not taking sufficient account of current realities
not expressing appreciation for the contributions of others, particularly where it hasn’t been fully competent
not delegating
making errors of fact, and appearing to make decisions irrespective of the facts
ENTJ (Roger’s type) (2% of the population)
issuing directives sometimes without explaining the reasons why
dominating the team
not taking account of others’ feelings
driving too hard
deciding too quickly and without sufficient consultation with others
not taking sufficient account of current realities
introducing too much change, and not leaving well-established, workable routines alone.
First, I won’t admit that all of these negative traits are completely accurate about ‘snookums’ and me … but I will just say that they are common characteristics of people who hold the INTJ and ENTJ personality types. I would admit that I have been guilty of some of the negative characteristics…
Besides, it is not always our differences or similarities that — in and of themselves — determine whether we succeed together as a couple or not… it is recognizing our similarities and building on them… and identifying the trouble spots and accommodating, compromising, acquiesing and limiting unnecessary conflict.
If you have a tendency to be a dominant type… just step back until it is really really necessary to say or do something. Sometimes it is better to let another person do it 70% correctly than jump in to close the gap to 100%. Laura has taught me sooo much.
This goes a long way in saying…. that since Laura thinks in the long term on certain emotional issues and some issues are very important to her… it was key to let her choose the house…. and… then we could move in with her…. that has been the secret to my happiness.
In truth, Entj’s and Intj’s are natural buddies… they are referred to as “Pals” in the literature… by this they mean that ” they work and play well together… with few natural conflicts”… looking at many of the other pairings… I am blessed… but then I always knew that.
Laura and I tend to send out cards every year that speak to some of the things we all areup to… as they say, ” a picture is worth a thousand words.” Although I am always amused at those who send these great tomes of family successes… you know what I mean… ( in truth, I am happier when folks are doing well )
” Jason was really miffed this year getting cheated out of the Heisman… but his well earned Nobel prize was waiting for him when he returned and Amanda was a little wild this year sharing her underpants with Britney who forgot hers.. but she is settling down after her Oscar… and my Husband Xerxies invented something called ‘fusion’… oh and that silly little award I got from Oprah as ‘woman of the century’… who would have believed it? so all in all it hasn’t been a bad year….. and how are you?”
However, I am willing to endure all of these in order to avoid the ones saying that Missy is finally getting her life together with the father or ‘fiancee’ of child number 4 now that she is out of rehab. Fiancee’? who are you kidding?
Soooo… our card was a ‘sporting theme’ representing all of the Universities in which one or all of us have attended… USC, UCLA, SMU, U of Florida, United States Military academy at West Point, University of Missouri at Rolla…. and Cal Poly.
What I am about to say is going to cause a number of very different reactions.
Allow me to advocate for a new and very special day called….. TAKE YOUR HUBBY TO WORK DAY!
Instantly, what goes through your mind, ladies? Are you saying, “this is a great way for my husband to see and better understand my life?”… or…. are you thinking,” akk! he’ll see what I am really up to during the day! I gotta hide Sven the thong wearing cabana boy.”
My guess it is neither of those… but more on the side of…. hmmmmm… ‘let me think about that for a moment.’
I won’t go into all the details, but my daughters did spend time with me at work and Laura did visit with me as she could… but this isn’t about them… this is now about ME! In our ever changing world, visiting with your wife at work is a great way to see her in a new setting, better understand her challenges and do something positive for your relationship. If nothing else, it gives some background and texture to the stories she brings home each night.
Seeing each other at work addresses some real issues, the average couple spends less that 30 minutes a day talking to each other… and people wonder why their relationships seem to be rocky? So whether it is meeting for a regular lunch ‘date’ or spending time in each others workplace once in a while… the time together is well spent.
My Laura is a Professor, so it seemed only natural for me to take a day every once in a while to sit in her classes and play at being a student again. Hey, I actually learned something…. just ask me about ‘cranial nerve 8’! I have also had the opportunity to watch her interact with students, which only proved to me that she has ‘adopted’ a number of them…. Maybe I am looking through ‘rose colored’ glasses… but she never fails to impress me.
So, if you are not as able as my wife is to ‘take your hubby to work day’… what can you do?…. try to meet more often during the work week…. maybe over lunch. The atmosphere is more relaxed… and you’ll be surprised … and maybe, just maybe… you’ll enjoy yourself.
Gosh, I thought that this would just blow over. Usually, most thinking people recognize their boo boos and apologize… but oh no… not more ‘money than sense’ John Kerry.
The fine Senator and veteran from Arizona John McCain asked John Kerry to apologize for his remarks to those men and women serving in Iraq… and John ‘three and fly*’ Kerry has gone on record by saying:
“I refuse to apologize!”
Just when you thought it couldn’t get any creepier… the crypt opens… and he can speak…. but can Kerry earn top good grades?
Happy Holloween!
Roger Freberg
* three purple hearts qualify a soldier during the Vietnam Conflict for a transfer stateside… the ‘reasons’ for his purple hearts has always been a question.
Hmmmmm… years ago, Grandma Frankie asked me as a little boy, “when did you learn that little girls legs weren’t attached to the bottom of their skirts?”
