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VOTE for the one who LOVES you, baby

Yep, John Kerry was framed by those brutal thugs in the vast right wing conspiracy... I don't know why i didn't see it before... but thanks, hun, it's all clear to me now!... uh... can you let me out now?

 

Sometimes it’s hard to sort it out when election time comes… but I have come to a few conclusions on this election:

1) VOTE for the one who will protect your community and your world and the ones you love… anyone can say they love you… vote for the ones who’ll show you!

2) Never vote for anyone who has shown personal cowardice… they’ll be just as likely to sell you down the river.

3) Vote for people who handle their public relations nightmares honestly. I mean, if you are going to lie to us, do it in a way that will impress and dazzle me!

When John Kerry tried to spin his way out of his recent problems… what was he thinking? Doesn’t he know that his speech was on YOUtube? Can we say idiot?

HALP me, Jon, Halp me

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4) Never, Never VOTE for anyone who says they are going to raise your taxes or fees… local and state governments are proving the worst offenders… that is the easy way out… and always has been. In the 1920’s only the rich paid taxes… and the top bracket was 7.5% and the IRS form was only one page. Hey, we don’t want to go back to those times… ‘but we’re hell and gone from Cartajena, angel’.

5) In Texas they say, “don’t tell me you love me, show me.” One of the two candidates you will vote on will make your life safer and better… and the other will make it more dangerous. Remember, the candidates are not complete individuals… which is why some good people go astray over time. Each party gives the orders… and most are carried out. However, this election presents all of us with some really clear distinctions… 

So who am I voting for?  Well… here’s the ticket I will NOT be supporting:

John Kerry endorsed by the maleviolent Order of Unwashed Terrorists

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Vote as though our lives, futures and families depended on it… because they probably do.

Roger Freberg 

 

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When Men & Women Diet

when a man diets... what he is willing to give up

 We all know what happens when women in a family diets… that means EVERYONE diets… or at least it means that YOU have to learn how to cook… and always hide your ‘satisfied’ look of rapture after eating a wonderfully ‘unhealthy’ meal.

Men, when a woman diets it means that you must sacrifice as well… and here are a few tips to show that you are supportive of their dietary quest… As you can see above… the choices of what foods to cut out are easier that you think.

1) If you must give up grains — as in bread — substitute with other things made from grain… such as beer.

2) Anything green can be discarded… if you haven’t already done so. Get your vegetables by consuming four legged vegetarians.

3) Become a secretive eater… you can do this best by joining organizations that meet in secret around meal times.

4) Praise the dieters as to their mental strength, courage, fortitude… it’ll keep them distracted from the fact that YOU are really NOT on a diet.

the dieters!Just a few ideas… to help you through THEIR diet.

 

WOW! I thnik those are real monsters bergers! YUM YUM! Oh…. you say they are really Turkey Burgers?

 

HMMMMM…

 

 

 

Roger Freberg

 

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Stanford COULD Beat Trojans… IF… they were the ‘INDIANS’, again.

Stanford... back in the old days... when they respected diversity
Oh, I remember the old days of the Stanford “Indians”… it was a cruel wind that blew through Palo Alto when they struck down their mascot in favor of… well… a tree. It’s kinda hard to say… goooo trees! Beeee a tree! Remember your roots are deeeeep!

Of course, some of the reaction at the time had more to do with who was in charge… and the mascot became a target.

Regardless, I am still fond of those old days… and as long as there are no old Trojans to protest, I am hoping my alma mater keeps their famous mascot… of course, it helps in choosing a symbol that can’t complain…. like bears, lions, banana slugs and ducks.

I do think that Sanford has changed and moved away from it’s athletic heritage… so maybe now they should be called the ‘Stanford Librarians.” It’s a thought.

I guess this is a lot to say in order to avoid talking about the Stanford-USC game this weekend… I am hoping that the Trojans take out their recent frustrations out on the.. er …  ‘librarians.’

Of course, maybe Stanford could win… it could happen… really… but then we’d be really suspicious as to who was betting what in Las Vegas.

 

Roger Freberg

What USC’s Pete Carroll thinks!
Slaughterhouse Saturday?
Bay Area invasion

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Hey Amber… Call the POLICE! I hear some GRUNTING!

A REAL Woman Weightlifting... 700lbs on her back“CBS) WAPPINGERS FALLS, N.Y. You can lift, strain, crunch and sweat all you want at the Planet Fitness in the Dutchess County village. But whatever you do, do not grunt.”

When I read this story… I could hardly believe my ears. They go on at Planet Woosey to justify themselves:

“We’re creating an atmosphere that’s not intimidating,” said Carol Palazzolo, the gym manager, who yanked Argibay’s membership ( they called the police on this dude) on Monday.

the Big One incher!“Carol” is an odd name for a gym manager… most of the one’s I know rhyme with Spike. Here’s the story. After checking out their web site… what you really have here is a ‘ladies’ gym that invites respectable men to join in order to help carry the freight… their moto — ‘the judgement free zone’ — is sweet and nonthreatening.

Carol and Planet Fitness… you are our Weenie Award Winner of the Day… the full one incher!

Well, boys, it goes without saying that Planet Fitness is not for you. I don’t blame the pink shirts at Planet Fitness… I blame you… open your eyes! Instead of rows of power benches and squat racks… they have rows of ‘steppers’ and ‘elliptical machines’… if they have T.V.’s, be assured that they are not tuned to anything resembling football.  This is not a guy place at all…. this is a place where you can go to talk to the girls and spend the day while someone else watches the kids. 

So, men ( and real women)… what can you do? You should join a real gym … or do as we do… build your own. Then you can GRUuUUUunNNntTT to your hearts content!

Here’s what a couple others others say:

found a place better than Planet Fitness
Too Good Not to Post!
 

Roger Freberg

 

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Halloween… a time for kindness

jack-o-lanterns

 

Maybe, it’s because I once worked for two different candy companies (chocolate)… or maybe it’s because I had my own ‘grim reaper’, ‘Spock’ and ‘fox’ canvassing the neighborhood each year, but I have always enjoyed Halloween. It is one of my favorite times of the year.

It is a time in which we can show kindness to children, stranger’s children and just plain strange children.

Year after year, our neighborhood grows grayer and with that less and less children come to call… or at least that is true of many of the homes in our neighborhood. This year, we had a steady stream of young people… some had ‘heard of our house’, or wanted us to remember they came last ‘year or years ago’. You know you are getting old, when your one time trick or treaters’ kids come calling.

See's Candy... simply the bestMany people miss the joy in the eyes and the excitement of children as they place their eyes on a big piece of chocolate…. and it’s free!

I buy popularity.

My secret? I buy See’s Chocolates in bulk… so it really isn’t that expensive… and as long as my ‘competition’ continues to hand out individual ‘tic tacs’… I can still be a hero. The cost of being a hero on this holiday is easy… as compared to Christmas.

Over the years, I have discovered what the REAL favorite bars are… you can see it when you observe what the kids take … when they are free…. and what they leave behind. Nutrageous is still king of the modestly priced bars.

If you are living in an affluent community… you might try Ethel M. Chocolates…. Forest Mars, Sr. really got this one right. Legend says that Forest Senior didn’t want to go down in history as the inventory of SNICKERS and M&M’s… but as a purveyour of quality confection… and in the company named after one of his two mothers ( both named Ethel).. he achieved perfection! Ethel M Chocolates

Next year… instead of watching kids look at their treats and say ,’yuck, raisins!”… go to the next level with something Chocolate that says, ‘thanks for stopping by!’

 

Roger Freberg